After 20 years, Baldwin and Harry meets – My Cartoon

After 20 years - Baldwin & Harry meets

After 20 years – Baldwin & Harry meets

Shit ‘O’ Shit, In and out of the Toilet

Disclaimer: Don’t claim.. I mean.. Just don’t clamin.. Its MY page :D.. Instead move on if it irritates you..

The shit here is ain’t the exact shit that is flushed (or should I say semi-flushed.. leaving the strains and the aroma behind.. -_^ ) in the Lavatory pan but the Comrades (or should I vomit the word scumbags, instead) who visit the Palace for at least few times a day (depending upon their consumption and bag’s capacity). Some comes in the first time for the day, hugs the Urinal Basin for a minute or so, does a begging hand gesture to the tap water and then does the Ultimatum. One can hear the Ugliest sound, uglier than farting. WIp WIp WIp WIP… The Shit (Remember, the subject, I mean, the Shit here means our Comrade) takes out 3 to 4 toilet Paper Towels from the Paper Towel Stand (that’s when you get this WIP noise) and wipes their scum (I mean, hand, basically) and then WIP WIP WIP, takes three more and dries their dirty wrinkled face, stares the mirror, combs their unshampooed hair and walks away.. Another Gentleman comes in, hugs the same basin, wets their hand with elixir (water, basically) and does WIP WIP, dires their hand under the hot hand dryer so then can dry their hand quickly (basically saving time for being extra productive to their employer and themselves, wow..) and does another WIP WIP, takes out two more paper Towels to make sure their hand is fully dry and thereby being highly hygiene (Picture Perfect). Another one (Here comes the Hero) comes in, finishes hugging the Urinal Basin (now don’t ask me if its the same one) and does a WIP WIP without even wetting their and with water. Could be, the kiddo had a pisslet (Urine droplet, basically) on their hand and uses the paper towels to dry them up.Spare some ten minutes in the toilet.. Just realize how quick the paper towel bin gets filled up.. See how many paper towels are put down and wasted.. See how many paper towels in the bin are REALLY WET.  We could be careless about this if they (Paper Towels, if you are yet to follow me) come from heaven (or even hell or from somewhere..like we care) but unfortunately we need to cut down the trees to make paper towels. (I’m using the word Paper Towels more than necessary number of times because you should not forget that we are talking about Paper Towels.. of course we are talking about Shit also but they are just heroes unlike Paper Towels who are the real SUBJECT)

Humans have been inventing things since their day one but if we just spare sometime and look back, it is just that, machines that are invented (and made as daily usage) after 1960 are the ones that pollute the Earth to the greatest extend. For instance, Jets, Factories, motor vehicles, Paper Towels. Plz don’t raise a question in your mind that all these eg., existed even before 1960. I’m stressing about the usage amount. Having said that, In a span of 50 years we somehow have managed to spoil the Earth’s temperature itself. What if this continues for another 50 years? Thank God, I’m already 24 and I’m going to 25 soon Yippe.. 😀 (It a Sad news basically.. but Good for some other reasons..)!!

I would end this by saying,
“We are never through with our Understanding unless we Realize”

All these stuffs we already understand.. but the question is Have We Realized?

~ Freddie

P.S :-  Save Trees (I got to say this because I’m sure no one understands my writing :p.. Poor handwriting skils.. you know.. Probabily thats why I did not score good marks anytime.. Holy Heck..)

P.P.S :- I took half day a leave today

P.S.S :- Sry for Parlimentary words (:p Oops.. I did a mistake.. Seriously though, I dont regret it)

P.P.P.S.S.S :- Good Question. Yes, you are absoultly right.. I’ve gone nuts now.. just now.. for 24 years.. (All P.S, P.P.S, P.S.S, P.P.S.S style are inspired by a movie called Mary and Max. PS :- Watch the movie.. its nice :p)

P.P.S.S :- PFA. :P.. Below is for ppl who don’t have time to read BS.. 😀 I mean.. no offense plz.. jus joking…

Shit O Shit, In and out of the Toilet - Save TreesShit O Shit, In and out of the Toilet - Save Trees

10,000

Today my blog has crossed the 10,000 mark. Its one of the milestiones to cross for any blogger. Thanks to my readers, I have done it. But the annoying is, I have stopped blogging. Its dying. I only made 2 posts in the last 5 months. Its so sad that I’m unable to spent time in writing. Who knows what the future might bring us the next second. Every next moment is a surpirse. Hopefully I shall resume my blogging carrier any moment. So expect for the surprise any time. Thanks once agian to all.

Freddie

Stop Killing my Music

Sunday morning, one out of the two days of a week where alarms music wakes me up. And today it was I miss you who did the job of waking me happily up. It’s such a nice song and I really don’t worry about not knowing the Artist of that tune or the Album either. The day has just begun. The music goes wild and with time its gets wilder, both in my room and in my heart. “I show a great partality for my regional music”, Well,  I dont agree but thats what people around me say. Not even in my vague memory had my mamma or papa asked why I don’t listen to regional music, but our servant maid did, today. I felt no new to that question for the fact that I have had answered it million times in the past with million different answers 😆 As my task list was blank for the day I connected to the web to figure out the history of the music that woke me. It is from Blink 182, a United States Alternative Rock Music breed. Got no clue on what this United States Alternative Rock means ;). Neither have I a clue on how that music came to my PC. All I know is I how much I’m attracted to that piece of tune. I continued to browse the web while the question that the servant maid asked me was constantly running in my head.  Thus far I had never asked that question to myself, but today, someone was asking from within. Yes, I was asking myself, “Why I’m I not listing to my regional music?” As I started to wonder the Why factor, so came this write up.

Music should not be created under compeltion. Music should be created for selling. It is much more than a commercial product. It is an ART.  And the creators will always fail, if they intent to create a music exclusively for business purpose. At least they would fail to astonish me. Oh, I forgot to say this, Music should not be copied (biggest of all).

Having said my vision on Music, today’s objective in Bollywood and Kollywood music industries is to create a false impression. And why I say that is because I firmly believe that they create it under completion and they also copy sometimes. So why is this happening? Let me explain what I feel.

 More films are created and the business units of the film making company wants at least five songs in every of their film. Moreover, Musicians are forced to create their piece since the situation, the story, the mood and the characters are already decided. Can you find fault in the masterpieces created by the legendary Michael Jackson? It is Michael who decides his music. He is not been compelled to create anything. He does it because he loves to do it. More than that, the other ingredients like the situation, the story and the rest of all are based on the music unlike my regional music where every this is vice-versa. Shame. And what are they going to do by creating music under compeltion? They are going to sell it.

And thus my wondering came to an end. Now I know why I don’t listen to Bollywood and Kollywood songs.

Freddie Maize

The Copper Coin – Gandhiji and his GENEROSITY

GENEROSITY

Mahatma Gandhi went from city to city, village to village collecting funds for the Charkha Sangh. During one of his tours he addressed a meeting in Orissa. After his speech a poor old woman got up. She was bent with age, her hair was grey and her clothes were in tatters. The volunteers tried to stop her, but she fought her way to the place where Gandhiji was sitting. “I must see him,” she insisted and going up to Gandhiji touched his feet. Then from the folds of her sari she brought out a copper coin and placed it at his feet. Gandhiji picked up the copper coin and put it away carefully. The Charkha Sangh funds were under the charge of Jamnalal Bajaj. He asked Gandhiji for the coin but Gandhiji refused. “I keep cheques worth thousands of rupees for the Charkha Sangh,” Jamnalal Bajaj said laughingly “yet you won’t trust me with a copper coin.” “This copper coin is worth much more than those thousands,” Gandhiji said. “If a man has several lakhs and he gives away a thousand or two, it doesn’t mean much. But this coin was perhaps all that the poor woman possessed. She gave me all she had. That was very generous of her. What a great sacrifice she made. That is why I value this copper coin more than a crore of rupees.”

Let’s also learn to walk in others SHOE!!!

The train has started moving. It is packed with people of all ages, mostly with the working men and women and young college guys and gals. Near the window, seated a old man with his 30 year old son. As the train moves by, the son is overwhelmed with joy as he was thrilled with the scenery outside.. ” See dad, the scenery of green trees moving away is very beautiful”

This behavior from a thirty year old son made the other people feel strange about him. Every one started murmuring something or other about this son.”This guy seems to be a krack..” newly married Anup whispered to his wife.Suddenly it started raining… Rain drops fell on the travelers through the opened window. The Thirty year old son , filled with joy ” see dad, how beautiful the rain is ..”Anup’s wife got irritated with the rain drops spoiling her new suit.

Anup ,” cant you see its raining, you old man, if ur son is not feeling well get him soon to a mental asylum..and dont disturb public henceforth”

The old man hesitated first and then in a low tone replied ” we are on the way back from hospital, my son got discharged today morning , he was a blind by birth,last week only he got his vision, these rain and nature are new to his eyes.. Please forgive us for the inconvenience caused…”

The things we see may be right from our perspective until we know the truth. But when we know the truth our reaction to that will hurt even us. So try to understand the problem better before taking a harsh action.

Search Engine Optimization for your WordPress and Blogspot Blogs

Finally… here we go… to sit back and relax… but get hits (readers) flowing into your blog… No more promotions, no more crazy shoutings like “I have a blog, I have a blog, come and read it, I have a…”

Let’s begin with an example. I’m going to write an article related to child workers in my country. Below is what I would suggest to optimize the post for search engines,

 
Picking the right title:
 
To Do: Have it lengthy. Your title should be a one liner of what you are going to say in your entire post. It is very import to choose your title.
Reason: Search Engines give priority to keywords present in you title than elsewhere.
E.g., supposing your article is about your views on child workers in your society then have a title like “My views on Child Labor in your country name/location”.
 
 
Writing your first few lines:
 
To Do: Have most of your keywords (primary words) in the first few lines of your post.
Reason: If meta tags are not present in your page (for WordPress blogs, meta tags will not be present) search engines (Google especially) will pick up/consider words from the first few lines of your post as meta tags.
E.g., proceedings with the same ‘child labor’ example, if your post is talking about any laws or acts for child labor like “Child Worker act of 1962” (or) if you have to mention any person who worked for Child Labor (or) any fact and figures then have it in the first line itself.
 
Picking the right URL:
To Do: Make it long (but not too long)… with almost all the keywords in it.
Reason: Again, Search Engines give priority to keywords present in you URL next to the priority given to the title.
Note: Too much of anything is good for nothing. So please do not have a paragraph in your URL. You may end up in misery.
 
 
Right Usage of Anchor tags:
 
To Do: Supposing you want anchor tags within your post, it is very much recommended. In fact, you can have them in your primary words/keywords to link it to related posts or pages or sites.
Reason: Keywords in anchor tags (links) are given higher priority than keywords in simple text.
Note: For keywords that naturally appear in your post/body you can link it using anchor tags. But again, the same advice, do not overdo it. It may give a spam kind of look to your post.
 
 
Begin with an image file:
 
To Do: Always have image files at the very beginning of your post. A small one will do… may be in the right top corner or left or anywhere. But at the top. It will do the trick.
Reason: Quite the same reason. Words in the image caption, alternate text, etc., would be much visible to search engines than simple text.
Note: Do not forget to add alternate name to the image. Also add image description and caption.
 
 
Navigation Bar – It must be present all over the Blog:
 
To Do: Well, I cannot suggest great things here since we (WordPress users) don’t have cent percent control over our blog. So, we have a widget called ‘Author’, use it. It’s a kind of substitute for Navigation Bars.
Reason: This is one way to ensure easy spidering (Crawling by Googlbot) for the Search Engines.
Note: Not using this may not lead to free flow within your blog. Here, free flow is not for you or your readers. It’s for the search engine spiders like googlebots.
 
 
Webmaster will help you to monitor your site:
 
To Do: Google Webmaster Tool provides you with detailed reports about your pages’ visibility on Google.
Reason: Just to check how well Google sees your Blog
Note: Well, you should know how to use the tool. You can easily learn it. Any difficulties let me know. I will do my best to help you.
 
Other tips are like,
 
·         You can submit your blog to Search Engines like Google, Yahoo, Live etc. at least once in a month. Remember to do test searches in Search Engines to verify that your blog shows up for right set of keywords.
·         Leave your link in popular sites. They would create incoming links to your blog which is also one big way of getting readers to your page.
·         Once Search Engines develops trust in your site your page rank will increase automatically.
 
Well, I will not say “THAT’S IT” for the number of tips and tricks since there are much more. But this is quite enough for people like us who just need readers and hits. May be if we are paid for every hit (a business blog) then we may look into deeper and technical things. But this itself is fairly enough.
 
I do know some tricks that illegal kind of things 😉 but will not share them. Hmm, maybe will share them privately if you ask for. But then, it should be just for knowledge sake and should not be used. Even I don’t use them 🙂 .
 
Hope this article would help you to sit back… relax… but get readers. So you no need to promote your blog any more. Happy? 
 
Hey, all the above trick will work for sure. After all, these ideas where from a Search Engine Guy.
Well, that’s guy is me only yar 🙂 . Happy Blogging.
 
Freddie Maize
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